Most legal pick-up line I have ever had

Brazilian client [You’ll be pleased to hear that Alizinha!] after one of those evenings out where you go to a place full of wankers and you have to buy a bottle of some sort and get a bunch of mixers free: So don’t you feel some sort of conflict here between us?
Me: No not at all. I am a lawyer. You are my client.
BC: But what if I was to kiss you?
Me: Ah. That wouldn’t be a conflict. That would just be unprofessional.
BC: Ah. Will you give me a most favoured investor side letter?
Me: No. I’m sorry but that is not negotiable.
BC: Ah, so how can I be sure that no one else is investing on the same or preferable terms?
Me: You can’t.
BC: Can I undertake detailed due diligence prior to investment?
Me: No.
BC: But I want to merge with you and have lots of underlying subsidiaries.